I’m crying because when my dad was eighteen he was going to join the airforce and then the night before he had a dream that Jesus slapped him in the face with a gigantic fish and asked him what he was doing and he woke up and thought, “Jesus is right what am I doing?” And that’s why my dad did not join the military.
But really I probably wouldn’t have been born if my dad hadn’t been fish slapped in the face by dream Jesus and I can’t even
I want to be a Hobbit so badly.
1. You eat at least 7 times a day.
2. You’re short and cute.
3. It’s perfectly acceptable to be chubby.
4. Hobbits can go unseen or unheard if they wish (little ninjas perfect for adventuring… even if it’s frowned upon).
5. The Shire is beautiful.
6. Most adorable homes.
7. Perfect little curly hair.
8. Can walk around barefoot.
I see no downsides to this.